Sugar and Spice

Tag: Sugar daddy

  • Dating with a sucky attitude: why self-love comes first.

    Martin is the most negative and pessimistic person I’ve ever met, hence why I’ve nicknamed him ‘Eeyore’; although that seems unfair on Eeyore who’s a ray of sunshine in comparison and at least cute (man, I’m a bitch). 

    Anyway, Martin is fairly successful; owning his own business buying and selling luxury cars and is quite well-known and respected in the ‘car world’. He drives a nice car (obviously), wears designer clothes, is well travelled and not unattractive for his age. He’s single and wants to be in a relationship but struggling to find anyone suitable. He can’t be happy whilst he’s single, but can’t find anyone to make him happy because he’s too depressed (about being single), it’s a real catch 22.  

    Martin was married, but left his wife because he thought the grass was greener, which he now realises it isn’t. I think he saw other men with young attractive ‘trophy wives’ and thought he could have the same; only that hasn’t quite worked out; a lesson there for all middle-aged men … 

    Martin works from home most of the time, so doesn’t get the opportunity to meet people or socialise that often, which is unfortunate, but not uncommon; it makes it difficult to find love though… 

    I’ve suggested he find a hobby, join an organisation or club and get himself out there, but he just says he isn’t interested in or good at anything. On the rare occasion he’s made an effort, he hasn’t enjoyed it or liked any of the people, plus there’ve been no attractive single women… so no point.  

    I’ve suggested he get a pet to keep him company if he’s that lonely, but he doesn’t want the hassle. I’ve suggested putting energy into platonic friendships and creating a support network, getting to know people who may be able to introduce him to someone, I’ve suggested keeping a gratitude diary to focus on what he does have rather than what he doesn’t, so he doesn’t feel like he’s missing out. 

    I’ve even suggested that he go to his doctor for help, but he thinks they’ll just prescribe antidepressants and he doesn’t want to pop pills (or be happy apparently)… Basically, no matter what I suggest, he’ll find a reason why it won’t work, and insists that he’ll be sad and lonely forever; which with an attitude like that, is likely to be the case. 

     He occasionally pays women like me for their company, but that depresses him too, and he spends the whole time moaning about how he can’t find love and saying things like ‘you’re only here because I’m paying you’, which is true but not really the point.  

    I’ve tried to explain how he needs to learn to love himself before he can love someone else, but he just says that he doesn’t know how, and that he can’t be happy and love himself until he finds someone; and we just go round in circles. He’s basically waiting for someone else to come along and magically fix everything for him, which isn’t how life works (unfortunately). 

    He’s handed over thousands of pounds to professional matchmakers, but they haven’t had any success, as no-one they suggest is good enough, and he gets frustrated and ends up being rude to them.  

    He’s had counselling too, but that didn’t work either (obviously, because nothing does) and in the end even the counsellor gave up (the will to live probably) and told him that she couldn’t help him. It seems to me that he must just like being depressed, there’s no other explanation for his behaviour; he’s just one of those people who is only content when they have something to complain about and can wallow in self-pity….that or he doesn’t know how else to get attention. 

    For someone who’s desperate to be with someone, he’s surprisingly fussy and judgemental, and will write women off without giving them a chance because they’re not attractive enough, or he doesn’t like what they’re wearing etc. He’s set the bar so high that no-one is going to be good enough, but maybe that’s the point; as long as he pushes everyone away, he can’t get hurt…he can just be miserable (which seems to be where he’s comfortable). It’s frustrating because this is a man who could have it all…. the only thing stopping him is his shitty attitude and pessimistic outlook on life.  

    Although I’m still in touch with him, I rarely see him; which is just as well as it’s mentally draining spending time with him, and enough to make anyone feel depressed. Even messaging to arrange a date is hard work, so I don’t bother.   

    He’s still trawling the sugar daddy sites looking for love, and recently messaged another sugar baby with the opening line “I don’t expect you’ll even bother to read this message but…”; hardly an inspiring introduction to entice or attract a young lady, but one that sums him up perfectly.  

    I don’t want you to think that I’m shitting on someone with mental health issues here, because I know what it’s like to have depression, it’s something I’ve struggled with my entire life. What I can’t cope with is Martin’s victim mentality and learned helplessness; it’s very difficult to help someone like that, as unless they want to change, you’re just wasting your time. 

     Expecting someone to come into your life and magically make everything better is unrealistic and grossly unfair on the other person. Other people can help, support and guide you, but at the end of the day if you want to change your life, no-one else can do that for you; as tough as it is, you’ve just got to put the work in.  

    Remember that the longest and most important relationship you’ll ever have in life is the one you have with yourself, so invest in making that one a good one. 

    Advice for Martin, and anyone else in his situation 

    1. If you want to be in a relationship, be the sort of person that people will want to be in a relationship with; work on yourself and being the best person you can. Have hobbies and interest, be fun and interesting, invest in non-romantic relationships and learn how to be happy in your own skin. Don’t expect someone else to give you there all if you have nothing to offer in return. 
    1. Don’t put your whole life on hold until you’re in a relationship, don’t not do things just because you’re single. Get yourself out there and live your life, who knows when the right person may come along or how long you’ll be waiting. It’ll probably happen when you least expect it, so in the meantime, make the most of your life and don’t waste time pining over something you don’t have. 
    1. Be realistic about what sort of person will be attracted to you. We tend to couple up with people of a similar attractiveness/ successfulness to ourselves. Don’t waste time chasing people who are way out of your league, unless you really enjoy being rejected.  
    1. Accept the looks aren’t everything, so don’t be vain; a lasting successful relationship is not based on physical attraction alone. Be open minded about what you’re looking for as love can be found in unexpected places, and from unexpected people. 
    1. Accept that it’s not someone else’s responsibility to make you happy, or in some way ‘make you whole’, no-one with their shit together is going to be attracted to someone who is deeply unhappy or unsatisfied with their life. Unless you want to be rescued by a narcissist with a ‘hero complex’, learn to live with yourself and be happy on your own. 
    1. Don’t feel under pressure to be in a relationship just because everyone else is, or that’s what society expects (tells) you to do. Some people are more than happy on their own, and there are a lot of advantages to being single; there are worse things to be, I promise. 
    1. Whatever you do, don’t come across as desperate! People can sense desperation and will either a) find it grossly unattractive or b) see it as an opportunity to take advantage of or exploit you; neither of which are great. 

    Good luck! 

    Emily-Rose xxx 

    If you liked this blog, check out my blog on physical attraction

    Physical attraction

  • Sex toys in public places – when it works and when it doesn’t…

    One of my sugar daddies, let’s call him Nigel, took me to see The Rocky Horror Picture Show, streamed live at the cinema. It was a last-minute arrangement as he wasn’t sure whether his wife would be joining him, however she decided not to, so I got the call, and cobbled together my best Magenta inspired outfit (think French tart meets gothic whore), whilst he played it safe and went as Brad.  

    He of course looked fairly respectable, dressed up smart with a bow-tie, glasses and long beige coat, whilst I on the other hand was half-naked and looked anything but…, however I didn’t care as I was unlikely to bump into anyone I knew; and anyway, surely everyone would be dressed up, right? Apparently not, for when we arrived at the cinema it seemed that hardly anyone had bothered, a few hardcore fans had made an effort, but most had not. Worse than this, it was half-term, so there were loads of families there with children… fucking fantastic!  

    Throughout the first half of the show several gin and tonics were produced from a rucksack, along with Maltesers; yes, he’s my ‘feeder’ (see my blog on getting kinky). When we got to the interval Nigel was rather excited, promising me something a bit special in the second half. Expecting something food related, I was slightly startled when 10 minutes into the second half he put his hand between my legs, and I realised that he was holding a small bullet vibrator; small but surprisingly powerful and effective. What he didn’t realise was how noisy it was, and that he’d picked a particularly quiet time to whip it out; as much as I was enjoying the sensation I had no choice but to confiscate it and hide it in my bra. Thankfully I don’t think anyone noticed, but there were kids sat in front of us…. For God’s sake Nigel….Think of the children! 

    After the Rocky Horror experience, I was a bit dubious about using toys in public places, however when another sugar daddy bought an app controlled wearable vibrator, I was only too happy to give it a go (the advantages of having a shocking memory, I’ll try anything twice).  

    Needing somewhere public to test it out, we met for a drink at a nearby pub, full of men enjoying a post-work pint and watching football. We found a little table to one side, and I slipped my hand into my panties to turn on the device. Once paired to his phone, he could adjust the intensity of two vibrating functions; one internal stimulating my g-spot and the other vibrating against my clit. He was very much enjoying watching me squirming and writhing on my seat, trying but failing to ease the sweet torment; he was being cruel, but I was loving it!  

    Unlike the bullet vibrator that Nigel used, this one was quiet enough to use in public without being detected, it was perfect.  

    I was somewhat struggling to concentrate and keep the conversation going as he sat there casually playing around with the settings, and whenever another man walked by, he’d give me a cheeky smile and turn both up to max vibes, making my body tense and my pussy pulse. It wasn’t quite enough to make me cum, which is probably just as well, but let’s just say that when we got back to his place it didn’t take long, and boy did I come!  

    The set also came with a vibrating cock ring which he wore when we got back to his; it was great fun sucking his cock whilst he was wearing it, as it felt like his whole cock was vibrating in my mouth. He didn’t keep it on for long though, as it was quite tight, and he was worried that his cock was going to fall off, which wouldn’t have been quite so fun…  

    I’ve since purchased the set for myself and sometimes use the cock ring with my regular sugar daddy (it’s not so tight on him).  

    It feels good fucking a guy whilst they’re wearing it because you can feel the vibrations on your clit (especially if you’re on top), and you can have a lot of fun edging the other person… and yourself. 

    I’ve obviously had my fair share of sex in public places too, and whilst there’s something exciting about the idea of getting caught, it doesn’t always make for the most pleasurable sex for women, who often need a little longer to come (see my blog on making women orgasm). The thought of having sex in front of other people and being watched is a huge turn on for me though (such an attention seeker), I’d be more than happy to have an audience, the more the merrier…. 

    Maybe one day when I’m rich and famous I’ll get to perform my own sex show, fingers crossed! 

    Hopefully see you there 😉 

    Emily-Rose xxx 

    Related posts

    Let’s get kinky…
    Top tips on how to get a woman to orgasm (or at least this woman) 

  • Birthday Blog

    Slightly different blog today, as this isn’t an extract from my (yet to be published) book, but a life update/ some fresh ramblings. In case you hadn’t guessed from the title, today is actually my birthday, today I am officially 36 years old; yay, well done me!  

    I’m not planning on doing anything productive today (other than writing this), no… today is reserved for contemplation and self-reflection; thinking about what I’ve achieved, what I’ve yet to achieve, and wondering where the hell the last 12 months have gone. I might even treat myself to a little cry and an afternoon nap, just because it’s my special day and I can. 

    They’ll be no partying or celebrating here, tonight I’ll be in my PJs by 6pm (assuming I get dressed at all), and in bed by 9pm with a book and a mug of hot chocolate; fuck it, I might even put my phone on airplane mode for a few hours. This may sound a bit tragic, but it’s my idea of heaven; and if you can’t do what you want on your birthday, then when can you…. 

    Thankfully it’s just me and my daughter here today, so no-one has to witness my birthday induced anxiety. My daughter is celebrating her anniversary with her online boyfriend, which totally trumps her Mum having survived another year; so, she’ll be spending most of her evening on her laptop in her room anyway.  

    Don’t worry, I have just come back from a few nights in Dublin with my regular sugar daddy where we celebrated in style, and on Thursday I’m heading up to Birmingham for an afternoon of shopping with another sugar daddy, so my birthday is not going unobserved. I may not feel the need to celebrate, but apparently other people do… 

    Am I where I thought I’d be at the age of 36; no, of course not. I’m single, living on a tiny boat (I moved onto a narrowboat), without any real career prospects. I’m still figuring out who I am and what I want to do with my life (all be it whilst having a great time in the process). I seriously thought I’d have my life sorted by the age of 30 though, but that didn’t happen (not even close) so 40 is my new 30. I’ve got four years to get my shit together; maybe I’m a late bloomer… let’s hope so! 

    My main goal is to publish my book, however I’m yet to find a literary agent; I’ve had two agents requesting the full manuscript though, so hopefully it’s just a matter of time. Yes, I know I could self-publish, but that costs money and I don’t have a clue what I’m doing, and I’d probably fuck it up; so, I wait, hoping that someone reads my book and thinks it’s worth a shot. In the meantime, book number two is being written, as I need something to do other than check my inbox every 5 minutes. 

    Obviously, I have my sugar daddies to keep me busy and pay my bills whilst I’m waiting, for which I’m eternally grateful; and I must say that I’m absolutely smashing it in terms of work/life balance at the moment.  

    What is my 37th year on this planet going to have in store for me, fuck knows…. Ideally a six-figure publishing deal, a best-selling book, and Netflix harassing me for movie rights… I’d also quite like to fall in love, ideally with someone who owns a nice house with a big comfy bed; we’ll rescue cats and possibly have a dog. I think that’s all, surely that’s not too much to ask… 

    I’m well aware that growing old is a privilege, not that I’m particularly old, but you know what I mean. I’m also lucky that all my bits work (most of the time anyway) and I’m in relatively good shape, although I do have to watch what I eat and exercise now, which sucks; you can’t have it all though…  

    Anyway, can’t sit here writing all day, I have an existential crisis to organise. 

    I’ll be back soon, when normal service will be resumed. 

    Emily-Rose xxx 

    *In case you’re interested in what I’m reading at the moment, I’m reading ‘In Pursuit of Happiness by Stacey Duguid’. It’s not a bad book, but not as good as mine; just saying… 

  • The ‘girlfriend’ experience: having a long-term arrangement.

    Jamie was the second man I met from the site and married when we met; but he and his wife were no longer physically intimate. The marriage was lacking emotional connection, conversation between the two being limited and transactional; what are we having for tea, have you put the bins out, etc; you get the idea. She was no longer interested in him sexually, or any other way for that matter; and he was feeling pretty shit.  

    Obviously, I’ve only heard his side of the story, and she might disagree, but the whys and the wherefores are almost irrelevant. The fact of the matter was that he felt disconnected and rejected, so did what people naturally do in that situation and sought connection and acceptance from elsewhere. 

    Jamie isn’t exactly ‘well endowered’ and his penis is noticeably bent (like properly bent in the middle) when he gets an erection; apparently one of the reasons, according to his wife, why their sex-life was non-existent. She didn’t think much of his penis, or what he did with it, regularly comparing him to her exes, who were all much bigger and better than him… of course. She made such an issue of it that Jamie considered undergoing surgery to straighten it, which would have resulted in losing some length, so thankfully he decided against it.  

    Jamie was self-conscious about his penis when we met, but with a little reassurance he was fine, and we consummated the ‘arrangement’ on that first night together no problem. In fact, we have a very successful sex-life, and it’s been great to see Jamie’s confidence grow during our time together. We’ve had sex in a variety of positions (several times) and his bent penis has never been an issue.  

    Don’t worry, I don’t intend to describe every penis I’ve ever fucked (I don’t have time), I only mention Jamie’s because very few men (if any) have straight penises, most seem to veer off in one direction or another, but unless you’ve got some sort of pretzel situation going on, you’ll probably find a way to make it work! Apparently, women don’t have straight vaginas anyway, so maybe they were just a bad fit, or she had a vagina like a curly wurly or something…   

    When we first got involved it was all a bit vanilla, but as the months went on and we got to know each other better, he became open to trying other things; things he’d been curious about but never had the chance to explore. He wanted me to take control and be dominant, so we got the toy box out and started experimenting with whips, handcuffs, cock-rings and vibrators. At the age of 66, Jamie tried anal for the first time and allowed me to return the favour a few months later (with a strap-on obviously).  It’s been great fun helping Jamie explore his sexuality and learn how to express himself in the bedroom; and I’m really proud of how far he’s come (insert your own joke here).   

    So, the sex works, but that’s only a small part (ha ha) of our arrangement. Jamie didn’t just want sex, he wanted someone to spend time with; an attractive female companion to inject some fun and excitement into his life… and I was the perfect person to fill his void (ahem) and provide him with the stimulating company he was craving. 

    We have lots in common, and both love the theatre and live music; I must cost him a fortune in theatre tickets, but he doesn’t mind, apparently I’m worth it (I mean obviously). We love going to London for the weekend and doing the whole West-End thing, and we’re both foodies, so enjoy eating and drinking out a lot (both in frequency and sheer volume). 

    We’re equally content at home chilling on the sofa with a cuppa and The Times crossword or watching some random shit on tv though. Our guilty pleasure is ‘married at first sight’, if you’ve never seen it, it’s alarmingly addictive. I applied for the show one night when I was drunk, unsurprisingly they didn’t get back to me, can’t imagine why…  

    We average around six nights a month together, more if we’re going away somewhere, and message or talk on the phone every day. We’ve both been through some tough times over the last few years, but we’ve supported each other through them. Jamie might be my sugar daddy, but he’s also a friend and practically part of the family at this point. It’s very much what you would call the ‘girlfriend’ experience, which is different to my other arrangements which are more casual, and less time consuming (thank God!). 

    Obviously, Jamie knows that I see other men, and that what we have is an arrangement and not a relationship; which he finds difficult at times. Things aren’t always good, and we’ve had our fair share of arguments and falling outs over the years. In the heat of the moment, we’ve both threatened to end the arrangement and walk away, however we always make up, as I think we both (for different reasons maybe) realise that what we have is too good to throw away.   

    Whilst I couldn’t cope with more than one Jamie in my life and I’m grateful that my other sugar daddies are less demanding; I also realise how incredibly lucky I am to have Jamie around and really appreciate all the amazing things we get to do together.  

    He’s already booked a get-away for our 4th anniversary, so it doesn’t look like he’s planning to trade me in anytime soon.  

    Thank you for everything you do for me Jamie. 

    Emily-Rose xxx 

    A word of advice: if you want your partner to be better in bed, telling them how shit they are compared to your exes is not the way to go! Comparing people in bed and making them feel shit will not give them the confidence to up their game or try something new. If your partner isn’t giving you what you want or need, don’t be a twat about it.  Instead, be honest about what you need and what turns you on; and what you enjoy or would like to try. So many of the men I see have endured years of unsatisfactory, boring sex. Honestly guys, life’s too short to be having bad sex… unless like me, you’re being paid for it.   

    Disclaimer: If you’re into something really niche, maybe coming home with a giant cot and adult diapers after 25 years of missionary might be a bit much, so test the water with something smaller first…maybe just a packet of wet wipes or something. 

  • Top tips on how to get a woman to orgasm (or at least this woman) 

    1. Very few women orgasm through penetrative sex alone. If your woman does, then lucky you, feel free to skip this blog. If that’s not the case (which for most of you it won’t be) then accept the fact that it’s going to take a little time and effort on your behalf. It will be worth it though, I promise.  
    1. Ask you woman whether she prefers internal (g-spot) or external (clitoral) stimulation. She may like a combination of both; but may need one in order to be able to actually orgasm.  
    1. Don’t be afraid to use plenty of lube, especially if you’re focusing on the clitoris. Even if she’s already pretty wet (which hopefully she will be), lube will enhance the experience. If you don’t have lube, then make sure to use her natural lube from her pussy or your saliva to glide your fingers over her clit.  
    1. If you’re using your fingers inside her vagina, don’t just hold them straight and push them in and out (classic schoolboy error). Also don’t think that the more fingers you can shove in there the better….  just use one or two fingers to caress the front inner wall of her vagina using a come-hither motion, and hopefully you’ll be able to find her g-spot. It’s often not as far up as men think. 
    1. Don’t be offended if she needs a toy in order to come, this is quite normal and nothing personal. If she does use toys, I’d suggest that you ask her to show you how she uses them, and maybe just watch her the first time. Even with toys, there’ll be a knack. 
    1. Keep communicating with each other. Not necessarily dirty talk, unless she’s into that, but just check in with her and don’t be afraid to ask her whether she wants it harder/faster/ softer etc. Remember all women are different, what has worked in the past with other women, may not work with this one. Being able to communicate with your partner re what you like and what feels good is really important. 
    1. Reassure her/ make it clear that you’re enjoying the act of giving her pleasure. Some women can take a long time to orgasm and may feel self-conscious about this. If they feel like you’re not enjoying it, or they start to feel guilty about how long they’re taking, then they will probably get to you to stop, or worse they’ll fake it, and all your hard work will have been for nothing. 
    1. If your woman has not come during foreplay or sex, then ask her afterwards whether there’s anything you can do for her, or whether she needs to use a toy or something to finish herself off. Just because you’ve come and got what you’ve needed, don’t assume that it’s over. Now that the pressure’s off, she may be able to have her release; alternatively, she may be absolutely fine and perfectly satisfied, but it’s always nice to ask. 
    1. If a woman tells you that she doesn’t come, or isn’t going to come, don’t take this as a challenge, this isn’t about your ego; it just puts pressure on her, which is definitely not going to help the situation. This isn’t a ‘get out of jail free’ card though, it doesn’t mean that she doesn’t want foreplay or to be pleasured, she’s just managing your expectations and trying to take the pressure off you both. Do your best to give her as much pleasure as you can, and accept that she’s not going to orgasm, then if she does it will be a bonus, for both of you. 
    1. Don’t necessarily expect a woman to come the first time you sleep together. For lots of women, in order to be able to come, they need to be relaxed and feel able to let go. There’s often a level of intimacy and trust that needs to be developed first. Take your time and get to know her, and don’t try to rush the process. She’ll get there when she’s ready.    

    Oh, and if your woman is a squirter like me, don’t forget your wet weather gear! 

    Emily-Rose xxx

  • Orgasms

    Don’t you agree that orgasms are just the best? I certainly love coming and making other people come, and despite having had sex with lots of people, I still think there’s something special and beautiful about sharing an orgasm with another person.  

    I used to think I was awkward when it came to orgasms, only being able to do so with the help of certain toys, however with age and experience, I’ve found that I can come without them; much to my delight and the delight of the men who’ve experienced it. I may take a while to get there, but it’s totally worth it when I do! 

    Obviously, women’s orgasms are different to men’s, we seem to be more complicated in that department. However, I consider myself to be lucky, as I experience orgasms from both clitoral and g-spot stimulation. My clitoral orgasms take longer to build, but when I come it’s a total lack of control, as the muscles in my pussy go into spasm, and I experience a total release. After coming like this, my clitoris is super sensitive and takes a while to recover, my vagina is good to go though, and I love being penetrated after having a clitoral orgasm, it makes for more pleasurable sex. 

    The other type of orgasm is more controversial and not something all women experience; I’m not sure I’d even really call it orgasming, as it feels more like ejaculating (or squirting as it’s referred to). Unlike my purely clitoral orgasms, I can squirt several times and have found that with practice I can exert some control over when I squirt (although not always).   

    A lot of my sugar daddies have never experienced squirting before, and it can take them by surprise. I mean, it took me by surprise the first time I did it; I thought I’d pissed myself… Now I know what it is, I think it’s just wonderful; the only downside being that it can be quite messy! Fine if you’re in a premier inn or hotel (sorry cleaning staff), but not so good when you’ve drenched the sheets (and mattress ahem) on your sugar daddies’ bed.  

    Thankfully most men don’t seem to mind; they know exactly what they’re doing and could stop if they wanted, but they don’t. To be honest I think they just love the fact that they’ve been able to make me come. 

    Unfortunately (or fortunately depending on how you look at it) I don’t come with all of my sugar daddies, only a select few. I don’t come through penetrative sex alone, so men that just want a quick fuck, miss out on that experience. I’m very good at making men think I’ve come, and making it feel like I’m coming, so men often think I’ve come several times, when in reality I’ve been a long way off even coming once. I don’t mind this though; I just finish myself off when I get home, it’s fine.  

    Men can of course have different types of orgasms too… One of my sugar daddies has what he refers to as ‘mental orgasms’, mental as in ‘in the mind’ rather than ‘crazy’. I’m not sure exactly how it works, and neither is he, but he claims that he can come without actually ejaculating. In all other ways it looks like he’s having an intense orgasm, and it feels just like one (apparently), only without the mess. The other night he had three ‘mental’ orgasms whilst I was edging him with my hands and a toy, before I climbed on top of him, and he eventually shot his load in my pussy.  

    The other way men can apparently experience an orgasm is through having their prostate stimulated. Done correctly you can seemingly make men ejaculate without even touching their penis.  

    I first came across prostate milking when I was working on a sex chatline, as one of my regulars was really into it; I’d read articles about prostate milking to him whilst he masturbated. I’ve come close to doing this with one of my sugar daddies, using a toy up his ass. He was really enjoying it but kept stopping me because he felt like he needed to wee (which he didn’t). I think if he’d just relaxed and ignored the strange sensation, he could have had a very interesting and enjoyable experience…. 

    I was rather mean to one of my sugar daddies once and put a cock ring around the base of his cock, and another around his balls. I tortured his cock (in the nicest possible way) for ages, but he was unable to ejaculate; he felt all the sensations of coming, but without actually doing so.  

    By the time I removed the cock rings, his penis was so sensitive that he couldn’t come no matter how much he wanted to. Don’t worry, whilst he went to sleep frustrated, he got his happy ending in the morning, and I believe it was worth the wait. 

    When men are paying for sex, they like to get their money’s worth, meaning that they’ll often try to come as many times as they can. This is where younger men have the advantage, and when I’m glad that most of my sugar daddies are older. Whilst some of my sugar daddies may go in for round two, most of them leave it there, two in one night leaving them more than satisfied. If I’m spending the night with them, they’ll often go again in the morning if they’re up for it, which most men seem to be… Why do men wake up feeling so horny? 

    Most men have preferences about where and how they like to come, and whilst a lot of my sugar daddies like to come inside me, some struggle with this, and need to be finished by hand, or prefer to come in my mouth; I’ve had men come on and in just about every part of my body. One of my sugar daddies, who likes to be wanked off, explodes with such force that no matter how careful I am, I always end up with come in my hair; which is definitely the most annoying place to get it.  

    Of all the options available, the mouth is certainly the least messy; although I can’t say I’m a huge fan of the taste of come, and I’ve yet to find a woman who is (not that I’ve done extensive research or anything). When a guy comes in my mouth, I swallow it down as quickly as I can, not because I’m a come thirsty whore, but because it tastes gross. If the penis is far enough down your throat, you don’t have to taste it at all, which is a bonus providing you don’t choke on it; you have to time it right though. 

    Maybe one day someone will create something to make men’s sperm taste better. I’m surprised men haven’t tried to create something already actually; surely the incentive’s there… 

    Anyway, I wish you all many happy orgasms, and if you haven’t had one for a while, maybe this is a sign to go knock one out…. 

    Emily-Rose xxx 

  • Being adaptable: an essential skill for every sugar baby.

    Being a sugar baby, it’s important to be adaptable, as you never quite know who you’re going to meet and who’s going to want to pay for your company. I like to think I’m fairly versatile and able to manage myself in whatever situations I find myself in, a bit of a social chameleon if you like; or maybe just a massive people pleaser, either way it doesn’t matter; what matters is that I’m able to adapt who I am to be whatever is needed in that moment. 

    As you’d imagine, there’s not an awful lot of cultural diversity down the far end of Cornwall, not many make it down that far, but being a sugar baby has given me the chance to spend time with people I wouldn’t have the opportunity to otherwise; and who aren’t in some way related to me… always a bonus! 

     I appreciate spending time with people from different cultural backgrounds and hearing about their experiences, and I’ve been lucky enough to be involved with men from all over the world, all shapes, sizes, ethnicities and religions. There’s still so much I don’t know though, so am always asking questions, and wanting to know more. Thankfully most of my sugar daddies are pretty open and don’t mind my curiosity/ nosiness. In return I’m more than happy to talk about myself and answer their questions; it’s a two-way thing. 

    I’ve come to find that if you’re genuinely interested in understanding another person’s experiences and where they’re coming from, then they’ll take the time to explain. Whether it be about their religion, gender, sexual orientation, political beliefs or whatever, I believe it’s better to ask then make assumptions that are incorrect, or heaven forbid rely on inaccurate or harmful stereotypes. As long as you ask in a respectful manner, and you’re prepared to listen in a non-judgemental way, people don’t seem to mind; and if someone doesn’t want to talk about something, they can always tell you to bugger off (or a polite alternative).   

    Having had a relatively sheltered upbringing, I’m often introduced to new things, and have had many firsts with my sugar daddies, most of which I’m happy to say have been enjoyable.  

    My first time eating oysters wasn’t quite so enjoyable though; for someone who swallows for a living, I really struggled! It was like swallowing mouthfuls of slimy gritty sea water full of sand and bits of shell, it was awful. I just sat there, unable to talk, my mouth full of oyster (and God knows what), gulping down wine in an attempt to wash it down. I don’t think I’ve ever felt more like a farmer’s daughter… 

    There have been several times where I’ve fucked up, like the time I ordered a pork dish when I was with one of my Muslim sugar daddies. Thankfully (as a result of the horrified look on his face) I realised straight away what I’d done and quickly changed my order. It wasn’t a big deal, but sparked an interesting conversation as to why he doesn’t eat pork, which was for a very different reason then I thought…    

    We all get things wrong every now and then, but that’s how we learn, right? And if people can see you’re genuinely trying, they’ll forgive the odd mistake. 

    Like most people, I wear different hats (metaphorically speaking), for work, as a parent etc, I’m different people to different people; and whilst it’s true that some of my sugar daddies get to see more of my authentic self, it’s also true that different sugar daddies draw out different sides of my personality. Some men want a slut, whilst others want a respectable lady, some men like to take me out to eat at fancy restaurants, whilst others want to chill in front of the tele; you quickly learn which parts of yourself to bring to the table, and which to leave at home.  

    At the end of the day, as a sugar baby I’m providing a tailor-made service to each one of my sugar daddies, and part of that is being the woman they want me to be. The better I am at giving them what they need, the happier they are, the more they’ll want to see me, and the more money I’ll make, it’s that simple!  

    However, if what they want is something I don’t feel comfortable providing, or they want me to be someone who is totally incompatible with my authentic self and my values, then I don’t take them on as a client; I may bend over backwards for my sugar daddies, but I’m not prepared to bend so far as to break. 

    I think it was Charles Darwin who said something like ‘it is not the strongest or the most intelligent of the species that survives, but the one most adaptable to change’; which really resonates with me. Having said that, it’s a balancing act, as whilst we all need to adjust and adapt to those around us, we mustn’t lose sight of who we are, where we come from and what we value. 

    Till next time, keep it real! 

    Emily-Rose xxx 

  • Let’s get kinky…

    A few of my sugar daddies are kinky, which keeps things interesting; nothing wrong with vanilla, but it’s nice to mix things up every now and then. I guess I’m also quite kinky, after all, I enjoy being tied up and dominated when the opportunity arises…  

    When I’m with my sugar daddies it’s not about me though; and whilst a few of my sugar daddies are dominant, more often than not I’m in charge, which is fine. 

    I did feel a tad guilty the first time I slapped an old man in the face and spat in his mouth whilst telling him what a useless shit he was, but you get used to it.  

    As a sugar baby, my job is to help my sugar daddies explore their sexual fantasies and desires, and introduce them to new things; be that toys, role play, bondage, prostate massage or pegging, there’s not much I won’t do. 

    My sugar daddy Nigel is certainly kinky, describing himself as ‘sexually deviant’. He isn’t shy about it either, which is great; I love it when people know what they want and aren’t afraid to ask for it! He actually introduced me to electro-stim, a shocking experience (ha ha), but not as scary as it sounds; although you have to really trust someone when you’re tied up and they have the ability to electrocute your genitals!   

    Nigel’s also what they call ‘a feeder’. I’ve come across a few in my time, and as someone who enjoys eating, I don’t mind; although I couldn’t be in a relationship with one. His guilty pleasure is Maltesers, which I also quite like; the only issue is that he likes to suck them and feed them to me from his mouth. Sometimes I know it’s coming (which is bad enough) but other times I kiss him and get an unexpected soggy surprise… eugh.  

    As is typical with feeders, food also ends up in bed with us, either smeared over body parts, or fed to each other, in what I can only guess is meant to be romantic? Whilst Nigel gets a lot of pleasure from feeding me, I don’t always appreciate the extra calories. One night he nearly made me sick feeding me a chocolate and caramel pudding; I couldn’t look at chocolate for a week afterwards. 

    A bit of role play is always fun though. One of my sugar daddies likes to come to my house and give me spelling tests; yes, he literally has a list of spellings stored on his phone for the occasion. Lifting up my skirt and pulling down my panties, he’ll bend me over his knee, spanking me each time I make a mistake. I’m not great at spelling, but it’s really come on; amazing how well you can remember things when there’s something at stake.  

    If he’s feeling particularly cruel, he’ll play with my clit whilst I’m trying to concentrate or give me a word such as peace (which could be peace or piece) and punish me for spelling the wrong one…. bastard! He’s actually a history teacher, so maybe I should just be grateful that it’s spellings and not historical dates he’s testing me on… 

    Ed (see my blog ‘The Sadist and the Masochist’) obviously needs to take control in the bedroom and will turn up with an assortment of items with which to make me squirm. During one session, he pulled out two handfuls of brightly coloured clothes pegs, each attached to a length of string, which he proceeded to peg along my naked body, from my inner thighs up to my breasts. 

    He left me squirming for a while, then made me count down from 5 before pulling the string and ripping the pegs off in one swift action. I was expecting it to hurt (which it did), but wasn’t expecting it to feel as pleasurable, it was like an electric shock travelling the length of my body. 

    In between meetings he threatens me with them, promising to add another peg every time I disobey him; I had 36 pegs last time we met (I’m a very naughty girl). He played with my clit whilst ripping them off, the contrast between the pain and pleasure was amazing.  

    On another occasion he enjoyed dripping hot red wax over my body whilst I was tied up and blindfolded, I didn’t mind the wax too much but was terrified that he was going to drop the candle on me or set the place on fire.  

    Very occasionally I’m persuaded to do things I don’t enjoy so much, like drinking my own urine, which I can safely say I (probably) won’t be doing again. The sugar daddy involved loved being pissed over, drinking my piss out of a glass, and getting me to piss directly into his mouth though… each to their own. 

    Often my sugar daddies know exactly what they want, which is good, because I don’t have to think about it. Sometimes however they’re not so sure, they want to try something, but don’t know what, so it’s up to me to get creative.  

    Over the years I’ve amounted an impressive selection of toys and equipment, so it’s usually fairly easy to find something suitable; however, it doesn’t always have the desired effect. I used a prostate vibrator on one of my older men who was having trouble getting it up, hoping that it might get him hard enough to fuck; which it didn’t, his cock was as limp as ever. He enjoyed it though, saying it was quite relaxing, which it must have been, as when I removed it from his ass it was covered in shit. 

    Talking of shit, I’m not a huge fan of eating ass, which is hypocritical, as I enjoy having my ass licked out but am less keen to return the favour; not saying that I haven’t or that I don’t, I’m just not that keen on doing it. Fingers are fine, I’ll happily shove as many of them as you want up there, I just don’t really want to use my tongue.  

    Having said that, I did stick my finger up a guy’s ass once and ran headlong (or fingerlong) into a shit coming the other way. Cleaning your own shit from under your fingernails is bad enough, but when it’s someone else’s…  

    I do appreciate that not all men are expecting, or prepared for a cheeky finger, but if you think it’s going to be a possibility, at least clear the way first. 

    The other thing I’m not keen on is feet; not that anyone has ever asked me to lick their feet or suck their toes, but if they did then I’d struggle. Again, no problem with men playing with my feet, it’s actually quite nice. I know it’s a big thing and people are really into it, but the majority of the men I know don’t have nice feet. I’ve seen some pretty vile looking toenails in my time…why the hell would I want to put them anywhere near my mouth… 

    As much as I try to fulfil my sugar daddies’ fantasies, there are some things that even I, as eager as I am to please, just can’t do. For example, one of my sugar daddy’s is desperate to find a sugar baby who’s breast feeding, so he can suckle on her tits. He’s got a fetish for ‘milky boobs’ (as he calls them) that I cannot satisfy; which is a shame because I think he’d pay handsomely for the pleasure… 

    Ultimately, we’re all different though, which ironically is the only thing we have in common. It’s unusual to find someone who doesn’t have at least one weird kink in the bedroom, and if they say they don’t, then watch out, it’s probably just been suppressed.  

    Quiet Gary from finance may be a married, middle-aged man who enjoys missionary once a week, but mark my words, one day he’ll flip and his wife will come home to find him in a full gimp suit. It’s always the quiet ones……     

    If you do enjoy doing weird things in the bedroom then good for you, I’m not here to judge, or tell anyone what they should or shouldn’t be doing. After all, suppressing sexual desires is not healthy, so as long as it’s safe and legal, find someone similarly inclined to explore it with and embrace your inner freak. If it’s not legal or you find it disturbing, then find a therapist and explore it with them, either way, you have to find a way to live with it. And if you want to lick my asshole and suck my toes, then go ahead, just don’t expect me to return the favour! 

    Emily-Rose xxx

  • Going self-employed

    Once I realised that I could make money from being a sugar baby and do so consistently, I also realised that I’d have to register as self-employed and declare my earnings to HMRC. I’m a good girl after all and believe in contributing to society and paying taxes, plus I had a lot of cash which I needed to pay into the bank. I put it off for as long as possible though, as I do with anything important; it was on my to-do list but never got done.  

    By the time I got my act together I’d missed the deadline for one tax year and was worried about being fined. I’d put it off because I wanted to make sure I was claiming all the expenses I could; but weren’t exactly sure what these were and how to find out. Whilst I appreciate the need to pay taxes, I wasn’t going to pay more then needed; I work too hard to be fucked by the government, I may be a whore, but not for them…  

    Anyway, I had questions about ‘use of home’ etc, so reluctantly decided to seek professional advice. A friend recommended a local accountancy firm that could offer me some, so when I couldn’t put it off any longer, I picked up the phone to ask for help. 

    I wasn’t sure what I was going to say but decided that honesty was the best policy. Putting on my best phone voice, I explained to the receptionist that I was a newly registered sole-trader and needed some advice re my first year’s tax return. She asked the question I knew she would ask, but hadn’t prepared for, which was “what sort of business are you running”.  

    I wasn’t sure what to say, so mumbled something about being a sugar baby, and hoped she wouldn’t ask me to elaborate. Thankfully, she was very professional and didn’t skip a beat; as if what I’d said was perfectly normal, and something she came across all the time. She said she’d pass on my details to the partner who dealt with new businesses, who’d email to arrange a meeting. She mentioned that it wouldn’t be for a few days as he was quite busy; yet first thing the next morning I received an email inviting me in for a face-to-face consultation. Curiosity got the better of him I think; amazing how you can clear your diary when you want to… 

    Having experience in accountancy, I’d already itemised every business-related expense onto a spreadsheet, each entry cross-referenced to my bank statements; every sex toy, bottle of lube, STI test kit and item of sexy underwear. Anything I’d purchased over the previous 15 months that could be considered a business expense was included. I’d also listed all my income; everything made through OnlyFans, nude modelling and my sugar baby work. I sent over a copy for him to check out ahead of our meeting, hoping that he’d be impressed by my beautiful presentation and meticulous record keeping; which of course he was (I’m an accountant’s wet dream).  

    I also did my homework on him, checking out the firm’s website and doing some online investigating/ light stalking. Never one to miss an opportunity, I wanted to check whether he was my target demographic; you never know where you might find your next sugar daddy. Unfortunately, he was young, wearing a wedding ring, and far too attractive to need to pay for sex. I dressed up anyway, aiming for ‘successful businesswoman with her shit together, who’d hitch up her skirt and let you fuck her over the desk if you asked nicely’; a look I totally nailed. 

    He obviously knew very little about the world of sugar babies and escorts, so naturally had lots of questions. He was keen to find out what I meant by ‘services rendered’, and what exactly I did as a sugar baby. I was blunt (as always) and told him that the money I received was payment for my company and my body (sex); which made him look uncomfortable and prompted the question as to whether that was even legal. I assured him that it was, after all, I wouldn’t be seeking professional advice if what I was doing was illegal…  

    To clarify, prostitution is legal in the UK, it’s perfectly legal to pay someone for sexual services; what isn’t legal is running a brothel or soliciting on street corners, which I don’t do (well not intentionally anyway). 

     Once we cleared that up, he was actually very helpful and reassured me that I didn’t need an accountant, I was perfectly capable of doing it myself. Being a small business, I could claim a flat £1,000 in business expenses without needing to itemise or keep records of any of my outgoings. Claiming anything else would be more hassle than it was worth and could leave me open to some awkward questions from HMRC; and the last thing I needed was them sniffing around asking me to prove that my sex toys etc are used exclusively for the business, because obviously they’re not… 

    As promised, the process of filing my return was fairly straight forward, although I guess it has to be. The only difficult part was deciding what to state as my occupation, how to sum up what I did in one word. In the end, I went with ‘escort’, although I could have put something more ‘socially acceptable’. Putting escort seemed funny though, and a middle finger up to society; I’m not ashamed of what I do, so fuck it. 

    Over the last few years, I’ve discovered that I enjoy being self-employed. Yes, there are disadvantages; If I’m ill I can’t work and earn money, and if something happens then it’s up to me to deal with it etc. Some months can be unpredictable, but there’s something about living on the edge that appeals to me, knowing that whether I fail or succeed is down to me; being in control over where, when and how I work, and how much I feel like working that week. I get a thrill from chasing money and pushing myself to earn as much as I can; I find it exciting.  

    I’m careful with my money though, and have some savings; so, if I’m tired and rundown, I can take some time off without worrying too much. Maybe if I didn’t, and I was living hand to mouth each month, I wouldn’t find it so exciting.  

    Anyway, having been self-employed for a while now, I struggle to imagine being employed; having to be at work at a certain time, and being told what to do etc, working my ass off to make someone else lots of money… (fuck that). Obviously, this may change, as I may go back into employment one day; but it would need to be somewhere flexible, doing something I believe in which benefits society. I’d also want to be work for a company that’s passionate about what they do, values their employees and isn’t just about making money; which let’s face it, narrows it down considerably. 

    I guess you might be wondering how much money I make; the answer to which is not as much as you might think, and not as much as many of you reading this. Having said that, I only work a few nights a week and the odd afternoon: eating, drinking, fucking, and generally having a good time, and am free to do whatever for the rest of the week; hence how I have time to write….  

    I earn more being self-employed then I did working for other people though, but then I never stuck at anything, so never made it up the ‘corporate ladder’ anywhere; I always got bored and restless.   

    Hopefully I can continue to work for myself for a while yet, as I much prefer working with people than for them. 

    Emily-Rose xxx 

  • I get a big surprise…

    Every now and then I’m contacted by a guy who’s taken a wrong turn and accidentally signed up to a sugar daddy site; wondering why (despite having no luck in the past) they’re being bombarded with messages from attractive women who are way out of their league.  

    This guy was one of those guys, naive and clueless, coming up to 50 and living at home with dad on the farm; never married, unable to get a date, and probably still a virgin (though maybe I’m being harsh). 

    Thankfully I got to him just after he’d signed up, before too much damage had been done (new guys are easy prey for less honest girls on the site). Despite not realising what he’d signed up for, and being slightly shocked by it all, he still wanted to meet; saying that he wasn’t against the idea of paying for female company or sex. His photo wasn’t great; but I’m nothing if not optimistic, so agreed to meet for coffee.  

    When I arrived at the agreed location, I walked straight past him, that’s how dodgy his picture was and how rough he looked. He was wearing old dirty work clothes and had come straight from the farm, you’d have thought he might have made an effort, but apparently not. My heart sank, my optimism had been misplaced, he looked like a fricking hillbilly; it sank further when he started talking in a thick west country accent about the farm, which was all he had to talk about.  

    We had our coffee though, and he enjoyed our time together and thought I was gorgeous… obviously. He’d led a very sheltered life, and didn’t get away from the farm very often. I felt sorry for him, so feeling generous, let him go in for a little kiss and a quick grope; which was probably the most action he’d had in years.  

    I explained the deal, that if he wanted to see me again he’d need to rent a room and pay for my company (his place wasn’t an option, and there was no way he was coming to mine); and although he still seemed hopeful (delusional) that he might get a girlfriend out of it, he understood the situation and agreed to my terms.  

    Before arranging our next meeting, he asked for some saucy photos, which I sent him, thinking it might encourage him to book somewhere and part with some money. I didn’t ask for anything in return, yet despite this, was treated to a couple of photos of the biggest cock I’ve ever seen; it really was a sight for sore eyes, and potentially a rather sore pussy. 

    When we arranged to meet the following week, he couldn’t get away for the night, but was keen to see me, so we arranged to go for a drive and see how far we could get in his car. Not how I usually do things, but for some reason (against my better judgement) I said yes; possibly the thought of his massive cock had something to do with it… 

     We met in a local carpark, where I jumped out of my car, and into his. Now, I’ve been in some dirty cars in my time and mine isn’t exactly clean, but his was absolutely disgusting; every surface covered in mud or shit, and rubbish everywhere, it was gross! He didn’t look much better, in dirty farm clothes, and a holey jumper which he had on inside out; I wasn’t impressed!  

    We drove around looking for somewhere quiet to stop, and eventually found a secluded parking area, which was empty but for one car. Unfortunately, there was a man in that car, however he didn’t complain so I can only assume he enjoyed the show. Should have charged him too really…  

    We got into the back of the car, which wasn’t easy with the amount of crap back there. I pulled off my panties and spread my legs, showing him what he was paying for and inviting him to take a closer look. I don’t think he could believe his luck, his hands were all over me, pulling my top down, groping and sucking my tits like a randy teenager. As for what he was doing down there, fuck knows, but whatever it was, it wasn’t doing anything for me.  

    As I leaned over to place my hand on his crotch, he got a bit funny and told me that he had a confession to make; the pictures he’d sent weren’t of him, he’d taken them off the internet. He then pulled down his dirty jeans, revealing some very old and suspiciously stained pants; which were then pulled down to reveal one of the tiniest, and saddest looking cocks I’d ever seen. It was like a sick magic trick, with every layer that came off, revealing something more revolting.  

    I was annoyed that he’d lied to me and lured me there under false pretences, although I was also a bit disappointed, I’m not going to lie…. I had no choice other than to be professional though and reassure him that it was fine; size didn’t matter, and the pictures he’d sent me were ridiculously big anyway (which they were). Saying all this whilst using my thumb and two fingers (all I could fit on his tiny cock) to encourage it to come out and play, which it didn’t seem to want to, probably too embarrassed!  

    He then apologised for not having had a shower that day, explaining that they had no hot water; before suggesting that I put his tiny smelly cock in my mouth to see if that helped the situation. I didn’t have the heart (or strength of character) to say no, so I did; checking for dick cheese first and being conscious not to breathe through my nose.  

    Not much happened, so as soon as I thought I’d done enough to show willing, I suggested that we get out of there before someone caught us and did us for indecent exposure.  

    On the drive back I asked him why he’d sent pictures that weren’t of him. I hadn’t asked him to send any, so why send anything at all. His answer was, “it got you interested though, didn’t it”, which really pissed me off.  

    He knew that we were going to meet, and that I’d find out the truth; how did he think he’d get away with it. Also, why put yourself in that awkward and embarrassing situation in the first place; men are so stupid sometimes…  

    The most annoying thing was that he didn’t think he’d done anything wrong, and felt that his actions were justified; which is weird as when we first met, he mentioned how he disliked people who were dishonest or fake… Rather ironic, don’t you think… 

    When I got home, I stripped, put my clothes in the wash and scrubbed myself clean in the shower; after which I updated my spreadsheet, highlighting his name in red, and vowing to never go there again. 

    It’s worth mentioning that this (like so many disasters) was at the beginning of my career, when I didn’t really know what I was doing, and was chasing money at any cost; I’m more cautious now. 

    The lesson here is that if something sounds or looks too good to be true, then it probably is. 

    Emily-Rose xxx